Saturday, February 28, 2009

Really good BSCF

I really had a good time at last night's BSCF. It was really interesting to have that interviewer there; I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to her. But I got a serious case of the warm fuzzies when I happened to be walking by Matt's interview and the interviewer asked him about his favorite combat system in a larp, and he mentioned the one in Alice! Thank you, Matt, you're very kind, and it means a lot to hear you say that. Though, for the record, it was technically Jared who designed it. I told him I wanted a system that combined random and deterministic elements, so that the stronger character would usually win but the weaker one still had a chance, that somehow involved playing cards. He took those requirements and made the incredibly easy, effective system that I plan on using for all my games. :-D We're such a good team.

Then Sheena ran Unconventional Odyssey for a really fun group. I confess, I was not totally sure I'd enjoy it because I'd heard reports that it was really random and zany-- I thought it was just going to be a lot of random weird things thrown together. That can be fun, but it's not always to my taste, so I just had to trust Sheena that this game would work for me. Sure enough, I was pleasantly surprised to find that all the crazy elements were actually quite well thought out, and planned in such a way that the craziness steadily climbed rather than just be all over the place. The Vampire parody aspect of it was spot-on, so nicely done that I was a little disappointed that the game wasn't all that conducive to actually playing your character's Vampire character. It was have been interesting to see how the parody actually played. I was in the cast role of Jessie, who I joked to Sheena was a mean casting because it made fun of me. In reality she actually is just incredibly fragile and particular to the point of being too prissy to live. I think I may have interpreted that a little too far into bitchiness territory, which may not have been exactly the right note, but it more or less worked and I had a fun time doing it. I got punched out byrigel so I must have been doing something right!

The horde for this game did a fantastic job too. It had a significant number of newer larpers in it who weren't really familiar with the experience of horde, but they all just jumped in and came up with some really great performances. Also, bleemoo was hilarious as the phone player, and I was cracking up over the various phone calls he came up with. I kept wanting to call him with stuff, but the horde kept us so busy there was just no time. Jared ended up as horde as well. In the past he's always expressed a slight trepidation with horde, as he was never sure he'd be good enough at creating multiple characterizations to really enjoy the experience. That is the challenge of the horde from the actor's perspective, and I myself often force myself to ask for horde just to give myself some practice at being very different people. It's quite hard, really. But Jared didn't have to worry; I was really impressed by how varied and strong all his various roles ended up being! It makes me kind of sad I've never seen him in a significantly different double casting on stage; I know he can absolutely embody two separate people at once. I asked him not to try to make Claudius and the Ghost all that different in Hamlet, in the service of making a point, but now that I know how well he can do it, I want to put it to good theatrical use!

Afterward, there were lots of good conversations. I always like talking about larping in a theoretical sense with laurion. He has some really interesting insight, and I remember him giving me a couple of the most helpful pieces of advice when I was writing Alice-- most of all, he clued me into the all-important idea that if you want something to happen in a larp, you need to make the characters want it to happen.

There was a bit of negative business happening as well that I got tangled up in, but I like to think I helped a little bit of resolution happen, so it ended more of less okay. I hate it when two people who I both really care about are just so different that they piss each other off without meaning to by not understanding how the other interprets things. This is complicated when one of the parties is not inclined to acknowledge that they've done anything wrong. For those of you who witnessed this behavior, I will say in that person's defense that they are not trying to be pushy and dickish, they're just not very good at picking up on the fact that people are made uncomfortable by that sort of behavior, and don't understand why people are suddenly angry at them, and so gets angry at that. I think it's okay now, and I hope everyone can forgive and let it go, but that was the one dark spot of the evening. Still, overall, I had a fantastic time with my fantastic hobby with my fantastic friends.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Shrewd and knavish sprite

Yesterday was a very good day. Spent most of it hanging out with and working with Jared, then rehearsal and a very fun BSCF. Rehearsal went well; I enjoyed the blocking for the scene I get Bottom transformed into an ass. I am quite impressed with Kindness in the role of Bottom; he's doing so much with it, and as I told him, he's going to blackjack this show from behind, throw a bag over its head, and carry it off over his shoulder. I'm feeling better about my end of things as well, if not perfectly. For Puck I have to creep along in a crawl a lot of the time, and I'm able to do it but not without some soreness afterward, but fortunately after a week of it my muscles are starting to get used to it. I'm still not a hundred percent feeling the Puck I'm being asked to play, but it's getting better now. I do enjoy the creeping sneakiness of it. I had a breif pang of nervousness when I realized this would be the first rehearsal I'd have with Frances, and I was slightly insecure about what she'd think. But of course, she was as generous and and unjudging as always, and said some nice stuff about what I was doing. That made me feel good.

I also got my costume yesterday. I love getting my costume, it makes me feel so much more in character. The various elements of it are strange-- an extremely long red coat, a red sash, an orange obi-thingy, a weird beige thing that looks like a tablecloth with a hole in the center --but when put altogether, I really liked it. The coat goes on first, then I put my head through the hole in the tablecloth, then the red sash gets crisscrossed over my toso so that the tablecloth becomes a tunic, and the orange one goes around my waist. It looks cool and Asiatic in a strange way, and the coat gives the impression of a tail. Marissa is an incredibly talented costumer; it really impresses me how she could look at such random pieces and figure out a great way to put them together.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Kosher for Lent

In about a half hour, Mardi Gras will be over and Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent, will begin. For several years now I gave up processed sugar, which was tough but good for my health and weight, and I always managed to make it. This year, however, I'm trying something different. Very different, in fact-- I'm going to keep kosher.
Now, I'm not the biggest fan of kashrut; I have enough issues about demonizing food without doing it for reasons that are even more arbitary. But since it's part of the lives of some of the people who are most important to me, I'd like to know what it's like to live with. I expect it will be a pain at times-- I do love me some pork, shellfish, and butter in pretty much everything --but I actually don't think it will be that hard. Cooking for and eating with Jared as much as I do means I usually stick to kosher food anyway so we can share. I can't remember the last time I cooked a dish that wasn't kosher except at home with my parents, so it's not like I don't know how to manage without resorting to the trayf.

As to the rules I'm going to stick to, I'm planning on going with what I gather is a fairly mainstream standard of kosher. I won't mix meat and milk, and I'll wait at least a half hour after eating one before I eat the other. While I will abstain from pork, rabbit, shellfish, and all other trayf animals, I will not worry about whether or not it's certified kosher meat. I am also not kashering my kitchen. I do know how to keep a kosher kitchen, as I help Jared to do so in his own kitchen at grad, but at Elsinore it's not practical and we don't have enough dishes for that. This roughly the standard that Jared keeps, so it's the one I am most familiar with.

It's certainly a sacrifice, but that's in the spirit of Lent. And hey-- Jesus most certainly kept kosher; he was the best Jew of all time. :-D

Intercon request

Just got through reading my All's Well That Ends character sheet, and I think I'm really going to enjoy this game. It's a character with a complicated plot, and I think I'm going to need to do some planning as to how to operate before I go into this game. I love scheming and strategizing in larps, so I'm very much looking forward to the challenges ahead of me. I very much want to go into this game with a strategy already in mind. I should reread the character sheet and do some thinking. I really need to schedule time to go take a look at the Hold Thy Peace costumes and borrow my old Dromio stuff; that should suit this character nicely. If I can get a hold of it, then my costuming for the con should be completely finished.

Also, it has come to my attention that my brother will be going home for his random Boston-area-school break the weekend of Intercon. Therefore he will be taking my car to go home on Friday. This is troublesome because it means our intrepid band of Brandeis congoers has one less ride option for those of us who, like me, will not be able to go up on Thursday. I had been hoping to just be able to drive myself and anyone else in our group who would be coming early Friday afternoon, but that's not an option. Anyone able to rideshare for that time? Any information and/or offers would be much appreciated.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Broke my streak

Kinda wasted today, the first time I've done that since I got home. I'm a bit disappointed with myself, but I just couldn't get myself to focus on anything today. I had an early riding lesson that went very well but left me very tired and sore, so when I got home I didn't have the drive to do much but nurse my aches and read through the archive of Order of the Stick. That really is pretty much my favorite web comic of all time, so I certainly enjoyed rereading it, but it was certainly not conducive to productivity today. I had my internship conference call tonight, mercifully lasting only one hour, and my boss was pleased with the script I wrote. That was pretty much my only accomplishment today, though. I practiced my lines a little, which is something, and I'm trying to write a bit of Paranoia before I crash. Maybe I can redeem the lost time at least a little bit.

BLITZ

I would just like to say I love the song "Ballroom Blitz" by the British glam rock band The Sweet. If that's wrong, I don't want to be right. :-D It's so glam-fabulous it's like a lost number from Rocky.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Progress

So the script is done; logged three hours and fifteen minutes on it. Of actual work, anyway, I can't count the periods I zoned out in front of Law and Order and wasn't actually writing. Big thing off my list, and made a little bit of cash. Nice. I need to remember to deposit my last check; I think it's still sitting in the drawer at home.


I also put another touch on my cat costume for LXHS. Currently it consists of a black leotard, black tights, jazz shoes, cat ears, and a long length of fluff I'm using as a tail. I had this idea to put stripes on the leotard to make it seem more catlike, so I bought a silver spray paint marker that would show up on the black. Considering it, though, I'm not a hundred percent sure I want to have stripes at all, it might look better to just be a flat black cat. So I finally decided to turn the leotard inside out and draw the stripes on the inner side of it, for two reasons-- so I could just use the black side if I decide I like that better, and so that I could have the leotard's right side look normal if I ever needed to use it again. I had to wear the leotard to make it possible to draw on it, with the aid of a long mirror, and drew two thick stripes across my back, little stripes around the outside of my arms, and a scribbly patch for my belly. The marker smells absolutely poisonous and has contaminated the entire second floor of the house, but I'm pretty pleased with how it came out. I'm still not sure if I want to be stripey or black, though, so perhaps I'll just have to get people's opinions when I come back. When I decide I'll figure out if it's worth it or even possible to put stripes on the stockings. I'm not sure it will be, this marker might be too scary.

It's not that late, but I'm kind of beat. Maybe I'll try to learn some more lines before I fall asleep. I'm trying to stay productive, since I've got so very much to do.

So much work

I have done little else besides work since I got home for this break. Good thing, too, as I have a ton to do-- printing games, writing games, writing for my internship, memorizing my lines, and studying. I'm actually quite pleased by how productive I've been, but there's still a lot to go. Alice is mostly printed, I've memorized two scenes, I've got a good start on Intercon costumes, and I'm currently working on my internship assignment for tomorrow night's call. I'd better keep going; can't let myself start slacking now.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Body rant

One day last week at Midsummer rehearsal Jared and I didn't have much to do for a while, so we starting messing around looking at pictures on DeviantART. He noticed a painting of Jessica Alba, of whom he's a big fan, and found an artist who does portraits of various female celebrities like her. His work was good, if perhaps a little on the creepy side, seeing as he did tons of images of them in various masculine fantasy poses in amusingly brief costumes. Still, Jared generally didn't like how he depicted them. One of the things he likes about Jessica Alba is her sleek curves, and all the images had her drawn much skinnier than she actually is, all hard stomach and narrow waist.

I find this kind of mind-blowing, and yet so sadly typical. This guy clearly thinks these women are beautiful, or else he wouldn't produce picture after picture of them. But despite this, he doesn't find them satisfactory as they actually are-- he has to slim them down and smooth them out to the point where they obviously do not look like themselves. It's like this in magazines too. Even women who are touted as the most beautiful still are still airbrushed and photo-edited so that they're thinner and sleeker and smoother. It makes me irritated when people think I'm crazy for wanting to be so thin. Why shouldn't I, when so many people find it more beautiful than the alternative? That Jessica Alba may be a hottie, but she'd be better if she were just a little bit smaller in the waist?

Maybe it's not exactly right, but I understand it. Yes, I try to judge on a case by case basis, but in general I find a thin girl more attractive than a heavy one. And even if everyone isn't automatically more beautiful if they're thinner, I believe that I am more attractive that way. I get a lot of ire from people for being as thin as I am and still worrying about my weight. I'm told it makes people feel bad because they can't be that kind of beautiful. But perhaps that's not quite fair to me. Do you ever think that, while you might not be able to be beautiful by being thin, maybe I can't be beautiful by being heavy, and that distresses me? God, even though my boyfriend loves me and tells me I'm beautiful, it's sometimes kind of tough to know that he technically prefers a body type I can never be no matter what I do. Even if you like full, curvy figures, mine can never look like that. I don't have nice hips, they're flat and bony. My breasts are nothing special. What I've got going for me is my flat stomach and narrow waist. The only way my body can look good is by keeping my midsection as spare as possible. The only weight I ever gain never goes anywhere that might look nice; it just hangs off my belly, turning me into a stick with an ugly bulge in the middle of it. So while maybe you don't like that you can't get as thin as I can, I don't like that if I do gain any weight, everything is ruined.

I hate that people hold it against me that I want to be so thin. That's what I find most beautiful for myself, so why shouldn't I want that? Maybe if I could have nice feminine curves, I would prefer that, but I can't. So why would anyone begrudge me? And furthermore, I hate the reaction people acting like that causes in me. It makes me hate my body whether I want to or not. I hate that I am forced to think of my body in terms of what's lacking in it in order to defend my preferences. "I have to be thin, 'cause I don't have anything else going for me!" Even when I feel like I do like my body, I also feel like I shouldn't because somebody makes some comment about how I look like a twelve-year-old, or some bullshit like that. I was told once that someone I know once said something to the effect of how they didn't know much about me, except I have food issues. Apparently that was the most notable thing about me. Again, my need to be thin is weird. And because I feel guilty about other people feeling bad, I put myself down in order to make them feel better. "Jesus, Phoebe, you're thin." "Yeah, well, I have practically no tits." I don't like playing that game. I don't like having to apologize for being thin by putting down some other part of myself, by saying yeah my tummy's okay, but I don't have the right hips, the right breasts, the right ass, the right whatever.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this. But I'm upset by the fact that it feels like I can't win either way. If I'm struggling to stay thin, I'm hearing about how crazy I am, and if I'm not, I've stuck with the fact that I don't have any of the features that make heavier girls attractive. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Mocha Cake

Combine:

2C flour

1 1/2 tasp baking powder

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp salt

1/4 C cocoa

2 C sugar

Add:

1 C soy milk

1/2 C vegetable oil

2 tsp vanilla

2 vegan egg replacements

1 C coffee, still hot

Grease 2 9" cake pans. Pour in batter. Bake in the middle of the over at 350 degrees for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean.

Let cake layers cool completely before removing from pans. To remove easily, boil some water in a large skillet and hold the pans over the steam until teh bottom of the cake is loosened.

Ice between layers and on top with mocha icing:
With a hand mixer, mix:

1/2 C melted margarine

3 1/2 C powdered sgar

1/3 C coffee

1 tsp vanilla

1 tsp cocoa

Return of the bad idea

Got started on my Magical Realism paper. Don't have much yet, but hey, every little bit helps, and the night is far from over.

Unfortunately, I'm somewhat distracted by other things. Remember this post, when I bemoaned my brilliant yet lame idea I had? I am plagued yet again by it. I guess by now I should say what it is. I'm a huge Talespin fan, and ever since Bernie so kindly made me a gift of Volume 2 DVDs, I've been watching a lot of the show. And since immersing myself in it, I am overcome with a desire to run a one-shot set in the Talespin universe based off this fantastic Talespin fan fic I discovered a while back. The setting of Talespin, in case you don't know, is anthropomorphic animals set in a pre-WWII tropical city at the height of the aviation age, and I find it very fun. It's a sort of Indiana Jones-style adventure, a great story, and a really great plot for a tabletop game. It would be easy as pie to adapt. I've even got ideas for pregen characters to play in it.

The problem I'm not sure who exactly wants to play in a Talespin one-shot. It's a great universe in my opinion, but on the cartoony side, and while I find that part of the charm, it may not appeal to everyone. Also, I really should be working on Oz or Paranoia instead. I don't actually think it would be that hard to write, but still, time is time. And I have no idea what system I'd use. Maybe GURPS, but I don't know it all that well. I'd have to figure that out, which takes more time.

But I think it would be fun. I'd love to do it. I'm just not sure I could/should get it together.

Bad habit

I'm in the uncomfortable place with work where I have nothing this is due immediately, but several things that are due in several days, so it would be wisest to get going on this stuff now. Unfortunately, I have a hard time buckling down seriously to work without the pressure of deadlines, which is really going to cause me trouble when suddenly several big things are due. I have a Latin quiz and an assignment due for my internship on Wednesday and a paper due on Thursday. If I use today well I should be in okay shape, but that's going to be a pretty sizeable chunk of work. I'll really have to buckle myself down.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

All's Well That Ends hint

I got my casting hint for All's Well That Ends at Intercon, and I think I'm pleased. I am genuinely cross-cast for the first time in any game ever. Well, maybe. I may be in LXHG as well, but it's actually not clear, and to be honest in that game it doesn't seem all that significant. Despite the fact that I always say I'm okay with cross-casting, no one has ever really done it before. I played my Marlowe 2020 character as male, but like most characters in that game it was gender neutral, so it was only by choice that I wasn't female. The funny thing about who I am in All's Well, however, is that I'm not only cross-cast, I'm kind of double cross-cast. ;-D The GMs asked that we not announce who we are, so I won't say any more than that, but I'm very amused. I think I need to borrow some things from the Hold Thy Peace locker for my costume. What I wore as Dromio in Comedy of Errors may be just the thing.

Vegan dinner

In one of my literature classes, Professor Flesch is in as a guest speaker, talking about the possibility that Claudius and Gertrude may have had an affair before Hamlet Sr. died, and therefore the chance that Hamlet was actually the son of Claudius. I am amused and interested.

Light night I experimented with the vegan dishes that jh1230 enjoyed so much when his professor from last semester threw a class dinner. We made artichoke pie, carrot and pear soup, and witticaster handled the mocha cake. Jared and I had to wrestle with the old Cuinsinart when it came to the soup, but it worked out in the end, and he was a really big help putting that together. As for the artichoke dish, hey, I've never met a pie I couldn't tackle. I was impressed with Mac's baking skills; cakes are hard to make from scratch. She also whipped up the most perfect homemade icing, which is something I always have a hard time pulling off. While normally I don't really feel satisfied without some kind of animal protein, I liked this dinner. It made me feel much better about having lightgamer and twilighttremolo. They're such good company I wanted to show them a good time. I don't know how often I can make myself leave out any kind of meat dish, but I'm wondering if I shouldn't work on adding really substantial vegetarian dishes that complement the carnivorous main one, so it's still a full meal if you don't eat meat.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Worst Puck ever


I admire Frances as an actress immensely. I think she's incredibly talented, and I love her amazing physicality. I cast her as Hamlet in my show because of how highly I think of her. Because of this, I'm really flattered by the parallels that emerged between Frances and myself as actors. We've been cast as twin brothers in Comedy of Errors. I've directed her and she's directed me, notably having cast me in the part that she would have given herself. And now, in Midsummer, I am playing Puck, not only the quintessential Frances-type role, a role she has played on several occasions.


I was not most of the cast's first choice for Puck. Naturally, they expected the part to go to Frances. That's fine, they're all entitled to their opinions, and she probably is the best suited for it of all the available actors. While I'm by no means displeased with it, I don't think this is the part I would give myself. The thing is, the fact that like four people not only thought that but said that to my face... not the most encouraging thing I've ever heard. Of course, Frances is totally unbegrudging and unresentful. She's been nothing but kind, as always. I guess I understand people having a preference for her over me-- she probably is the better actor of the two of us --but it just slightly hurts my feelings to have people tell me that they're thinking that.

Whatever, I can get over that. The problem is, the Puck Taylor is asking for I'm having a really hard time delivering. His conception is totally nontraditional-- he wants a disinterested manipulator who despite wanting to mess with the people, he's not terribly engaged in the result. His Puck doesn't really want anything, and I'm having a hard time turning that kind of personality into any kind of action that can be played on stage. I felt like I was coming off as a cold, flat, joyless sociopath. As Jared pointed out, Taylor's accepting of the idea that fictional characters don't need genuine motivation to do things because they're fictional, but I don't know how to act a character who wants nothing. Drama is people wanting things-- that's all there is to it. And the text is not easily adaptable to his conception. He's tossing out all the stuff about Puck being a playful prankster who makes dumb mistakes-- despite the fact that it literally says so in the text --which is fine, I guess, but I'm really really scared that the audience is going to hate a Puck that is so joyless and not playful. And when they hate me, it's going to come off as my fault as a bad actor. It's not that I'm convinced his take on Puck can't work, but I do worry that it's one the audience will not get. And unless he gives me a way to translate his conception of that personality into some kind of action I can readably play onstage... I'm terrified that I'm simply going to be the worst Puck ever.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Hamlet flashback


We're reading Hamlet in one of my literature classes today, and I have to say, I have been grinning from ear to ear. I haven't really revisited the play since I finished with my version of it, and damn, rereading the lines brings everything back. I can picture practically every moment of the final show in my head, and I'm just bursting with pride at how good it really was. I hear the lines as the actors said them, and I picture the blocking in my head, and I'm just so pleased with how everything worked.


Damn, you guys are good actors and good techies. And damn, I was a good director.

Hold Thy Peace and money

I've had some very nice conversations with witticaster*lately. We don't usually talk like that, and it was really nice, so perhaps it's something I should seek out a little more often.

Yet again, we got the Hold Thy Peace allotment from F-Board, and the results are not good. In fact, even worse than last year-- $750.00 out of a $1750.00 request. So that means we need to budget the hell out of this show. The biggest thing that worries me is that certain parties seem to have a mentality that our fundraising account, the money in the club's bank account that isn't part of what F-Board gives us, is there to expand our budget. That isn't right at all, it's there so we can take care of problems that may arise. Yeah, F-Board giving us a thousand dollars less than we asked for is pretty bad, but Hold Thy Peace is going to have shows after this one, and it really wouldn't be fair to wipe out the rainy day fund. What I think we should shoot for is doing everything in our power to stay within the $750, and then use the account for when we inevitably go a few hundred over. But again, I really don't think it's okay to budget past what we were given. I'm the treasurer of the club, so nobody gets reimbursed unless I hand in the expenses, so I'm asking all the people who are likely to be spending money on the show to clear things with me before they actually pull out their credit cards.
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